Update

God is sooooooo good!! Um hmmmmm yes He is baby!!! My girlfriend got her test results back from her biopsy and she is FINE!!!! Praise Jesus!!!!!

Yall don't know how worried I was about that girl!!! Mainly because she hadn't told anyone except me and that she was walking around in a daze for a while holding this all in but now thankfully it's over and I'm so dang happy!!!!

We are celebrating this weekend with a little gathering at her house. One for her daughter graduating from college and starting grad school in two weeks and also for her good news from the doctor!!!!

Shoot yall know I'm all about celebrating life baby!!! Why wait, don't wait, celebrate, celebrate!!!

Party on Wayne!!!!!!!

I'm just soooooooooo happy!!!

Today was a dang good day!!!

Free Monday

Thanks everybody for all the encouragement you continually give me and yes I am feeling better. Everyday gets a little better and within the week I'll be back to feeling like me. ;-)

Now on to my freebies of the day!!

Free coffee Monday at MickeyDees, they said last week was the last of it but I did cop me a free cup today as well and it was the vanilla flavored one YUM!!! I like Hazelnut coffee but not McCafe's, it's kinda bitter!!

KFC ~ They were giving out a sample piece of their new grilled chicken. Dollface ate that and said it was tasty.

Walgreens ~ I had two reward coupons *thanks Believer* totalling $8.00. So I got 3 cards, a magazine, a gallon of milk and a Snickers bar for seventy cents. YAY ME!!!!!!!!! I gave the candy bar to the cashier because he gave me my milk for free and it states clearly on the coupon NO DAIRY. Dude was too sweet and he said he wasn't going to be able to eat for 5 hours and said grab a candy bar, so I said what the hell?

I love free stuff man!!!

The day after

I ain't feelin' too cute today and that's for sure!! Can you say pukealicious!!

UGH!!!!!!!!!

Headed back to my bed for rest hoping this wave of yuckiness doesn't last too long.

Gatorade, tea and Chocolate Ensure are my best friends for now.

UGH!!!!! Everything tastes like metal, EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!

That is all!

Feelin' 2 cute

I took this pic today right before leaving for chemo. I felt really cute, bald and all baby!!! LOL!!!

It's now 6:30pm and chemo is over and I'm half the way there!!!! I'm feeling really good about that!!!! Three down and three more to go!!!!!! YAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!

Now I have to take it easy for a couple of days because my immune system will be totally out of whack. Drinking plenty of fluids to flush out the poison. Isn't that weird???? They tell you to drink, drink, drink so you can rid your body of the toxic meds. *SMH*

You put the damn poison in and then tell me to flush it the hell out?

Crazy!!!!!!!!

I'm usually so pumped full of fluids til it's unbelievable. So much so that I need to wear a freakin' diaper at night. I know TMI right? LOL!!!!

I always have these dreams that I'm going to the bathroom right after chemo and then I wake up and er, um, I'm going!!!

Straight up fragglenaggle BS!!!!

The hotflashes were off the chain today while there.

But baby bring em on and let's get this ish finished!!!!!!!!

The weather is lovely, lovely, lovely today.

A high in the 80's!!!!!!!! I so love a beautiful, warm and sunny day.

Makes me smile!!!

Resting up this weekend with movies, books, word searches and Suduko.

Yall have a good weekend and don't forget to Expect Great Things!!!

Is it in the air we breathe?

I don't know yall but it seems that cancer is becoming the new black. Damn I mean everyday I hear of someone being affected by this dreadful disease. Today I was at the speaker's series and she was diagnosed in October with breast cancer. She was really emotional and I just wanted to get up and hug her. I hate seeing people cry and no one rallies around them to give them comfort. Her mom came with her to this series and her mom was sitting directly behind me and of course her heart was full and she too was sobbing.

But our speaker said that God was her tour guide and that she was not going to let this diagnosis stop her from living a good life. A life filled with blessings and love. She said that some not so good times were ahead but she will press forward and stand on her faith. Positivity was flowing from her and I just felt so blessed at that moment. I mean I know it was all God today for me. For one, I didn't feel like going to the series today but I said what the heck. I wanted to sleep a little later because it was very gloomy, rainy and cool here today and I hadn't been to the series in over two weeks and I really wasn't feeling it. Not in the least. But I got up and said just go and see what the topic is about and if you don't want to stay, then of course you can always leave.

Humph, this woman and I connected right off the bat. She even told me my eyes were sparkling the entire time. Part of our project was to scrapbook today and I LOVES ME SOME SCRAPPING!!!! I picked out some positive words of encouragement and put them all over my page. Of course I found some Di.sney princesses and put them on there too, for my Dollface LOL!! Basically my page just said take time out for me and to be good to myself and love life regardless of the hard times.

I'm so glad I didn't miss this week. After the session was over I gave her a big, big hug and she reciprocated. She gave me something positive to think about too. Instead of me saying I'm just starting treatment she told me I'm a 1/3rd of the way finished and that was wayyyyyy cool.

Her motto is Expect Great Things and baby you know I am!!!

Everyday I'm going to expect nothing but great things and I'm jotting them down and storing them up for those days that aren't so great.

She even gave me an idea for all the get well cards I received. She put hers in a book and she says she looks at them when she feels overwhelmed and it helps her get through the day. Such a simple but awesome idea that I totally love!!

My labs came back good and chemo is set for Friday so the 2 shots worked, YEAH!!!! I'm expecting great things from this treatment! I'm expecting great things for my life!!

I'm going to expect great things for my friend too. She called me this afternoon to tell me she went in for a uterine biopsy (by herself). I was too outdone!!! She hasn't told anyone, not her husband or her daughter. Just me and I felt really, really bad for her because you know worry sets in and can bite you in the ass and she did this all alone. Made me want to jump through the phone and hug the mess outta her. She doesn't have to do this alone, man!!! She said she wanted to tell one of our other mutual friends but she didn't, said she felt like she was being overly emotional and didn't want to bother any of us with her stuff. *Sigh*

I'm telling you I do not want her to feel like she can't talk to me because I'm going through right now. I'm here to offer support if she needs it and of course I told her that but she feels like she will bring me down and I feel the total opposite!!!

How do you get people to know you mean it when you say I'M HERE FOR YOU?

My heart is heavy for her because she is carrying this burden without the support of her family. She has two sisters and a grown daughter. Her mom is ill so she surely doesn't want to tell her, for fear that it will send her into a straight panic and cause a major setback in her health. I don't know what to do but be here for her anyway that I can. This really made me sad because I have such a huge support system and I feel it helps me immensely. I think I would be majorly depressed if I had to do all of this alone and I so want to call our other friend and tell her too. I don't know...

Tomorrow is another day though and I am going to Expect Great Things.

Lifetime

Why in the hell do I watch this movie channel?

The Nat.al.ee H. story is much too much!!! I can't even begin to describe the way I would feel if something happened to Dollface like that. My heart aches for her mom, family and friends! How do you go on after such a tragedy like losing your daughter? This hurts man, this hurts.

I shouldn't watch Lifetime, ever!!!

Glorious day

Earlier today I was at my second home, you know the freakin' hospital, yet again to get another shot of Filgrastim *brand name Neupogen* to boost my white blood cell count. The side effects are bone and joint pain. Well for me it's a headache. So far no great bone pain and this is shot number 2. I had my first one yesterday. Yeah my white blood cell count is still low and no chemo so far and I'm getting kinda nervous about this.

Why?

Because Dollface was extra clingy to me yesterday. She even cried when her mom came to pick her up. That scared me yall. She never cries like that when her mom comes to get her. I'm trying to chalk it up to her being extremely sleepy but part of me is like what is this child sensing?

You know they say animals and kids have special senses when something ain't quite right?

Shakin' it off, shakin' it off.

I've been doing really good with thinking positively and I don't want negative thoughts to fill my head.

So I go back on Monday for more labs to see if I can have chemo on Tuesday or Wednesday.

Why the hell am I begging for poison to be shot up through my body???? This is mad luda!!!!!

I so want all of these treatments to be over and done with and me to be living a long, long, long, long, healthy life. Ask and you shall receive.

Four more treatments to go, just four more and then we'll see what's next.

The weather yesterday was lovely. I even grilled food for us cause I had the energy and felt like grilling. I haven't done that in some years man!!

I grilled chicken, salmon, tilapia, scallops, steak and hotdogs.

Dollface and her cousins were over playing and having a good time in the sunshine.

Sunshine makes me feel good. Really, really good. I can't get enough of that sun shining down on me. I swear it makes me feel alive!!! Well except that one time in Mexico when too much sun wasn't such a good thing LOL!!! It burnt my azz to a crisp and I was hurtin' baby!!! I ain't never in life had a sunburn but trust that Mexican sun did a number on me. Can you say aloe vera and solercaine for days? The latter didn't work at all, that crap only made it hurt worse to me. Cold showers and plenty of aloe all over the skin worked though and I will put on sunblock the next time and I won't stay in the water all flippin' day either. We spent well over eight hours just baking in the sun at a beach in Cancun with no sunblock. Shit, just cause you black don't mean jack!!! I learned a lesson the hard way. Sunblock is for us too, trust and believe!!! ROFL!!!!

Well I'm bout to go eat some of my good grilled food and try to work on this little headache I have. Other than that I'm bout to enjoy the rest of my 70 degree Saturday.

Totally unexpected!!!

I had to go to the hospital again today for labs to see if my white blood cell count has come up so I can have treatment tomorrow. It was such a beautiful day out, I ran some errands, went to the library and read a few magazines, selected a few books, picked up some lunch and then headed home.

I received a package in the mail today that I had no clue what it was or from whom. The package came from a woman in Mobile, Alabama and the name was not familiar to me in the least. It had my name on the manilla envelope and I was looking at the package all crazy like cause I know I hadn't purchased anything from anybody in Alabama. I had not been on E.ba.y or A.ma.zon in a while so I honestly had no clue what this package could be.

When I opened the envelope a book was inside and the cover read, "Your friend http://www.tanyetta.com/ thought you might enjoy this story."

*Face falls to the ground*

I know you had a little help from my friend in Arizona LOL!!!!!

The author also signed my copy. How cool is that?!?

Thank you soooooooo much. That was soooooooo unexpected and so very thoughtful.

You see I posted a while back that I was trying to win a sweepstakes with that same author and dear, sweet Tanyetta purchased the book for me.

Dang you just never know how people that you have never "met" in life just reach out and touch you!!!

But kindred spirits think alike and I'll leave it at that.

Too funny!!!

Here she is about to give birth in a few weeks *very close* and she's thinking about lil' old me on the opposite side of the country. Boy this innernet thang is something sweet!!!!

Once again thank you for taking the time to do something for a stranger. I really appreciate you taking time out of your extremely busy and hectic days, right before the baby too LOL!!! That's awesome and you rock baby!!!

So now I'm off to read this fab book, Immortal Danger by Cynthia Eden.

Rainy days and Mondays

Why is it raining here that will turn into sleet later this afternoon? UGH!!!!

Why do I have a sore, scratchy throat and the sniffles and CANNOT take chemo today and it is postponed until next week because my white blood cell count is low? UGH!!!!!!!

Having to change the schedule again throws off all my plans for my play nieces graduations, proms, Mother's Day and Memorial Day. UGH!!!!!!!!

Why did that lady at church tell me that I would get sick from being around a lot of people and that I needed to sit my butt down somewhere and I shrugged it off but now three days later my azz is sick??? UGH!!!!!!!!

I need a do over cause this Monday is making me feel like UGH!!!!!!!!!!!

Pics from the trip

Dollface and The House of the Mouse

Let me just say that a good time was had by all. Now let me say I did not have enough time there. I really wanted to stay longer but we had to get back for holy week here at home. Mom never misses The Seven Last Words of Christ at Trinity and this year was no exception. Should we get the chance to go again next year, we will stay the entire week because I know it is not possible to see everything in a couple of days. Dumb move on my part. I should have booked her ticket to come home on Thursday and Dollface and I could have stayed until Saturday.

The weather kicked our butts!!!!!!!! It was sooooooooooo cold on Tuesday til it was ridiculous!!! I mean bone chilling cold. We could have had our winter coats on with hats, gloves and scarves. That was a bummer but we endured Univer.sal Islan.ds of Adven.ture for about 8 hours in the cold til we couldn't take it anymore!!!! Those rain ponchos went to waste. Didn't even look at any water rides and it only rained on Monday for about an hour while I was in the grocery store.

Oh on Tuesday we went to the Magic King.dom and it was full to capacity and they didn't let us in.

*SAY WHAT*

Said it was like a three hour wait to get on rides and not worth it. They were open from 8:00am - 1:00am and that we could come back at 7:30pm and TRY to get in then. I said fugitaboutit. There was no way I was coming back that night on a try.

So we left there and headed for Unive.rsal Isla.nds of Adve.nture where Dollface and I got on every thrilling rollercoaster in sight!!!

Chica was stoked and I was like WTF am I doing????? But I had a damn ball!!!! I haven't been on a rollercoaster in well over 20 years because my fat butt couldn't fit on one in that long. This time baby, baby I fit in the seats super comfortably but was scared shitless!!!! Number one it was kick butt cold and I had on my little baseball hat covering up the bald head, right? Then of course these dang rides zip all through the sky and whatnot and my little hat kept threatening to come right off my bald head. So I had to hold on to my head and hat with one hand and white knuckle the bar with the other. Sooooooooo crazy!!!! But I'd do again cause it was such a blast!!!

Shoot we had sooooooooo much fun that I could have done that park another day and just skipped the Magic Kingdom all together but seeing as though it was Dollface's first time there....well you know we HAD to go see Mickey.

We went back to the MK on Wednesday and got in this time. The weather was nice on this day and it got warm enough for us to take off our jackets later in the day.

She had that look again yall. You know the one like, is this really happening??? I had to keep asking her was she excited?? Cause you couldn't tell at first. She was in a daze for real LOL!!!

Then she was kinda cranky bout' standing in all those long lines.

Humph she wasn't the only one!! Mama Brown was like, "I'm too old for all this!!"

She got on the Teacups and Carousels with Dollface cause uh Bunny don't do spinning rides like that. But I can do all the coasters and stuff. So that was waaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyy cool of my mom to ride with her.

I thought she would pull my arm off in the Haun.ted M.ansion. LOL!!!! But then she bragged to my mom that it wasn't scary at all. Funny!!!!!!!!

I so loved seeing all the dads and their little girls in line for the rides. So much family bonding and togetherness is just lovely to witness.

Oh and trust I saw major, major meltdowns. Those babies were just extremely overwhelmed. I think it's us that enjoy this shit more than they ever will?

Dollface hated the fact that she couldn't go swimming. The resort we stayed at didn't have any indoor pools and it was just sooooooo dang cold that we couldn't go swimming early before we went to the parks and the same for when we returned at night. I couldn't get over how unbelievably cold it was. I have never, ever been to Florida where it wasn't in the high 80's so this was a big blow to me!!! Oh and of course the day we were leaving it was beautiful and was going to continue to be for the next several days too!! BUMMER FOR US!!!!!!

You know she got pink princess ears right? Too dang cute for words and everything else to boot!!!!!!

We had a good time yall if only we had more time and the weather was better. *sigh*

Yesterday after we got home I ran to the store so I could make a dish to take to the Cedar Supper at our church. Literally, I dropped my bags at the front door and went out the back door. I cooked a cheesy spaghetti dish and ran it over to the school where the Women's Club was preparing the hall to get ready for the dinner later that evening. I was going to stay to help serve but one of the members told me to go sit my butt down somewhere. She said me taking chemo was not conducive to being around all these people to serve food. Chile please I just came back from the world's most crowded place on earth. Standing in line with a bunch of germy little kids hell!!! But I listened to my elder and sat my butt down. Then after helping out just a little with the place settings I took my tired butt home and laid it down for the night!!!!

Mom and I went to Trinity today and saw the Seven Last Words of Christ which was a dynamic group of women only this year. They tore the house down with their interpretations. My church is doing the same but man I'm way too tired to go tonight. The service this morning was almost 4 hours and the service this evening will be the same if not longer. Plus I've got to get up early in the morning to go to the hospital and get my labs done. Chemo will be on Monday so I've got to get a little rest before hand.

AND I'm about to start our Easter dinner so I won't have to do soooo much tomorrow or Sunday.

Oh and for the record my Dollface is ever so slightly spoiled . Thought I'd throw that in for giggles!!

I'm back

And TIDE as hell!!!!!!! LOL!!!!!!!

Going to bed rat nah!!!!!!

Feeling really, really beat down at the moment

Feeling frazzled

I've been checking the weather forcasts for Florida for the past couple of weeks and it was stated that it would be in the mid 80's with afternoon thunderstorms possible during our stay. It always rains when we're in Florida so I was cool with that. I bought a couple of ponchos for the water rides anyways so that was no biggie.

Checked the weather again last night, how bout it's supposed to be in the high 60's low 70's with hail and crap. Gotta do a whole nother outfit scheme for Dollface. Washing and ironing clothes in a minute and baking cookies for the womens club pre-Easter bake sale tomorrow and I'm supposed to go out tonight for a birthday celebration but I'm tired right now so I'm postponing this until I get back.

Got a bunch to do and I'm bout to pop some vitamins and get it started baby bayyyyybee!!!

Oh and the surprise was ruined for Dollface. Her paternal grandmother talked to her on the phone Wednesday and told her I was taking her to WDW and Dollface hasn't been able to sleep for the past three nights because she is sooooooo excited. She keeps waking up at 2, 3 and 4 o'clock in the morning. Poor baby!! We haven't confirmed to her yet that she is def. going but she told me about this on Thursday. I tried to play it off but girlfriend knows something is up. *sigh*

April 2nd

Happy Birthday to me baby!!!

Vacay

Whoo hoo!!! I'm getting excited and I can hardly wait to tell Dollface that she will soon be in the most magical place on earth LOL!!!!!!!!!!!



Can someone please come and help me finish packing???? That is something I hate to do cause I always, always overpack!!!!



I have all of my girl's clothes ironed and most of them in the suitcase. *Don't ask* This is something I had to do and if you have been following this and the other blog for years then you know why LOL!!! But serious as a heart attack baby!!! She won't be looking crazy on my watch!!!



All of my clothes are ironed and a few items are in the suitcase. I still have to pack all the first aid stuff and toiletries for both of us.



I still need to purchase more batteries and another memory card because yall know I'mma be snapping pics every two seconds!!! Chica gon' be like ENOUGH!!!!!!!!!!



I have allotted 2 outfits a day for her in case she gets dirty or messy and I know we will be hitting major water rides so I have two ponchos packed for us both. Mom said she ain't riding nothing but the TeaCups and the Carousel. *Good cause I can't do those spinning ass rides. I will be puking all day.* Florida is super warm right now but I so don't want to get drenched and walk around in wet stuff. That was cool when we were kids but ummm right now I think I'll pass. So I have those space bags packed so I can keep our extra clothes dry during the day while we are riding the rides just in case somebody changes their mind and wants to ride the water rides with us!!! My mom used to be a rollercoaster daredevil back in the day!!! I mean I'd be scared to ride and she'd be like you wuss!!! For real!!



Why did my knee pop something crazy yesterday and I couldn't hardly put any pressure on it? You know I was like, am I gonna have to take my cane with me, cause I ain't shamed LOL!! I will be walking or limping around Dis.ney cane in hand and if it gets too bad uhhhhhhh wheelchair please. Mama Brown will just have to be on push duty. But seriously it feels much better today.



Oh and my baby girl made the honor roll for the first time as a third grader and she is beyond elated!!!!!! She worked hard to pull that D up in math to an A bayyybeeeeeee!!!! Plus she has perfect attendance and they will be rewarded for that this coming Friday.



Dollface doing big thangs!!!!!!!!! That's my baby!!!



But she's still talkin' major smack about not continuing with the violin. *sigh*



I'm on the hunt for a used violin next month cause she had to give the loaner back and I don't want her to forget what she has learned already over the summer. AND I will make sure that she goes over to her cousin's house to get in some practice too. They play the bass, violin and the flute. That's him giving her pointers. Love those kids man!!!











Plus the little boy that she has a mad crush on plays the violin. Bet she will still wanna play after she finds out that little tidbit of info!! I'm not letting her give this up LOL!!!!