Today has been a total off day for me. I mean everything was thrown off!!!!!!!!! I woke up late, got to the speakers series late, exercised late, ate late. JUST EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!! Don't you hate when an off morning sets the tone for the whole day???? To top it off tomorrow is Ash Wednesday, oh boy!!!! I so need to give up coffee but.... the flesh is weak!!!!!!!!!! Oh lord forgive me a sinner!!!!!!!!!!! I just bought a new bag of a special blend called Crooked Brew and it's soooooooo good!!!
I am going to give up coffee for Lent. I can do that!!!! Yes I can do that!!!! 40 days without coffee is not going to kill me!! I can switch to tea. We have some amazing flavors in the pantry and tea is much better for me anyway. When I say I'm addicted to coffee I mean I get serious headaches if I don't have any and I know that is awful!!!! So yes, I'm giving up coffee. For Lent, not for good. Maybe by the time Easter rolls around I will have kicked my addiction and won't crave coffee like I do now. We'll see!!!
Tomorrow is the day for the selection of teams for the annual heritage contest at my Doll's school. Ya know we go thru madness every year. This year is no different!!! She was off for a total of 5 days. Thurs, Fri, Sat, Sun and Mon and I told her to study one hour, one stinkin' little hour each day. Two pages for one hour and she would be set. She knew two pages already so she was on her way. Well today when we were studying you know what happened don't you? Yeah her butt didn't study everyday so she didn't know much of the new material. Instead of me panicking like I usually do, I said, "Oh well." If she doesn't get selected it's on her. I can't and I won't stress myself out over her lack of studying when she's at home. I can only do what I can when she's here, that's it, that's all. I'm giving that up for 2010 and beyond. I only want the best for her but if her mom won't push her to do more at home, then so be it. Mediocrity suckssssssssssssssss!!!!!!!! My mom didn't push me hard either and I suffered greatly for it!! So I know that's why I push Dollface so hard. *sigh*
I love going to work out! I mean it's still a struggle to actually do it but I feel so damn good after it's over!!! The treadmill sucks man!!!!! I want to run on it but I feel unsteady. Bunny ain't graceful if ya didn't know!!! LOL!!!! Plus the doc said un uh!!!!!!! Folks be gettin' that ish in baby!!! It's inspiring to see everybody in there doing the damn thang!!! Makes me wanna do more. My usual workout is swimming for 45 minutes, treadmill for 25-45 minutes and the elliptical for as long as I can hang, which so far has been a whopping 10 minutes! That thing is the devil!!!! I'll get better at it I know and I'm tired as heck when I leave there but I feel refreshed as well. Does that make sense??? I still need a workout partner. I'm totally envious of the people that have someone to work out with them. I think that makes it a tad easier. IDK???
I'm grateful that I have so much time to put in right now but I truly need to be back in the land of the working folk!!! My oncologist scares me though. Everytime I see that chick she's lining me up for some more dreaded ass tests!!! I need a trustfund just to take care of all these medical bills I have acquired!!! I mean for real they are astronomical!!!!!!!!!!! Thinking of all I owe puts me in a bad place. Seriously my stomach starts hurting and my heart beats really, really fast and I get frazzled big time!!!!!!!! I need an assistant when it comes to the medical billing aspect of my life. It's soooooooooooo overwhelming!!!!!
I think I had too much coffee today. I'm on cup three right now trying to squeeze in as much as I can before tomorrow. What a goof!!!! Got the shakes trying to drink coffee like it's my last day on earth or something. *sigh*
Cole...I'm stoopid!!!!! lol!!!!!!!!!!